I went over to my girlfriend's to try and come up with some music. That really didn't happen because we got...sidetracked. And her dog wanted to play with me...man that puppy can play!

I had time on the train home to write some lyrics. Here's what I have in mind for the songs.

The first one that I have lyrics written down is about the descent into madness. Life after a trauma and the weakening stablitily of the mind. This is going to be a hard, heavy rock song...

The second one I think I have music and lyrics written out. I originially wanted it to be a rock ballad (ala poisin's "every rose has its thorn") but as I started to play the other night it just turned into some soft rock like I normally listen to. This one is a love/hate song to my 2 lovely ladies who visit me in my mind. I'm crazy I tell you!

The third one I came up with lyrics about getting the chance to say I love you before a traumatic thing occurs. The importance of always saying I love you...even when you're fighting because...it can be the last time you say it or hear it.

I love music because no matter what...there's a way to express life.

Co-writing with the girlfriend

My girlfriend Kate said we should write songs together to try to deal with what's going on. I said ok.

My first one I just wrote lyrics for is about going insane. I seriously think I'm insane right now. After waking up from a dream where I got slammed by a bathroom stall door (yeah...) my face was pounding.

My second song will be a rock ballad about my love/hate relationship with my invisible friends...the ones that follow me aroud since the accident.


and you still think I'm sane?

More update on my guitar and comeback-o-rama

Morning! It's been quite an eventful few days...the majority in the music realm. First off I got my guitar back! I was so happy when I called on Wednesday. I was expecting to receive it on Saturday but the lady informed me that the repair guy fixed it the night of. Not only that...it was a good price. 40 plus tax. As I was walking home I saw what he had to do to it. I have broken wires, stripped screwed...and her had to replaced the entire volume control. All for 40 bucks!

My baby sounds so nice. I went to my girlfriend's spring concert last night. Funny that they put the concert the night before the Senior's last day. It is a tradition in my old school to go to the beach and watch the sunrise before your last day of high school. I unfortunately didn't get to go on my last day, and neither did my girlfriend. But most of the musicians did. Well the concert was pretty good. I didn't care for some parts but otherwise...it was good. I sat with my girlfriend's family and my friends. Back to where I was going with the sunrise. I'm the type of musician that puts everything into my performance and walk away completely drained. And it's funny because half of the band is missing the following day of a concert. So kudos to those who actually got up to see that.

In other non-musical news...I'm heading back to my job tonight after the accident. Super Ninja Usher returns! I'm a little concern about my return but hopefully I won't do so bad.

During my time at the concert I ran into a teacher I knew (orchestra...) and we were talking about my recovery. Man, I can't tell you how scared I am. I just keep thinking that in time...everything will be ok.

Guitar drama

About two weeks ago my guitar died. Her name is Sue and she is a Washburn guitar. It was very sad. I was jamming away and all of a sudden the sound cut out, I fiddled with the controls on the body of the guitar and I felt something loose underneath the body. I decided, well...let's see I can examine the damage.

I took out my trusty screwdriver set that my lovely girlfriend Kate bought me for Easter and went to work on the guitar. I got the screws off but the piece wouldn't come off. I was completely stumped. I didn't know what to do.

Dejected, I turned to my mother on advice of which shop should I take my beloved Sue to. I have many choices since I live near a huge street with several music stores along the way. My mom advised me to take to the little music shop where I used to take trumpet lessons since they deal with Washburns.

I got on my bike and headed on over. I got there and they told me that they didn't do electrical work but they then sent me down the block to a guitar store. I only went into the store once...which is why I didn't go there first. I got back on my bike and at 1:30...it was closed. I was at a complete lost. I then got home and was going to ask my dad if we could stop the place before going to work, but my mom didn't get home in time for me to stop by...and then later on that evening I was involved in the accident.

So I waited over a week because I was recovering, and I finally took Sue over today. Nice little place. I have to call on Wednesday to see how the progress is going and to get an estimate because the lady I dealt with didn't do the actual repairs. Sue may be back in my hands on Saturday and I hope the expenses won't be too steep.

Zaja Valve Oil

When I was a music education major at CW Post, I was involved in a small ensemble called the Brass Ensemble. Here I sat around with 7 other trumpet players. There were three of us female trumpet players. One was a perfectionist who scared the crap out of me, that's how good she was. The other was a very lively young woman who had a great sense of humor and a really nice smile. She plays the trumpet really well and she is very relax when it comes to practicing or performing.

It was the very lively one that turned me onto this product of Scented Valve Oil. She would inhale the aroma of French Vanilla among the variety of scrent she owned. I thought it was the funniest thing since Spitballs. Playing the trumpet, there are some products out there with a wacky concept or name. After I fell sick it took me months to embark on the journey to find these "scented valve oils." I did a search and found the site.

www.zajamusic.com

It's a little business that sells certain brass products. There's a product that keeps your case clean, there's an air device to help develop your breathing, and there is a product for your lips. There is also apparal being sold.

I was amused at the site and I told my mom about it. Sure enough, for my birthday I received two bottles of Zaja Valve Oil. I was beyond amused and immediately opened my package and started to inhale the aromas of Strawberry and French Vanilla. Now I wasn't so crazy about the French Vanillla but I loved the Strawberry. I decided to take the oils for a test run.

Before Zaja, I was a devout Al Cass user. Al Cass for everything. I'd have three bottles of it wherever I played. I decided to use the Strawberry on my trumpet since I use it more often than my Flugel (which then got the french vanilla treatment.)

My first reaction: My god, my valves have never felt this smooth.

I continued to be amazed at how fast my valves moved on both the trumpet AND flugel. The nest thing that amazed me...how long the oil lasted. After a week of constant playing, I didn't have to oil them. I think it was a few weeks later that I actually had to pull out the bottle and reoil. It amazed the shit out of me. Then I started to think damn, something must not be right...maybe the stuff needed for the scent will corrode or destroy my valves or casing. Nope...nada...no damage at ALL.

So not only does my trumpet smell like strawberries, it performs well with this new oil. I was very impressed with the results. My bottles are still full, and I still have 3 bottles of Al Cass laying around...i'll use my Al Cass in case I need to perform and not stink up a place.

What was I thinking...during the time of the car accident

I told my professor today that I was involved in a car accident as she was giving me her card to contact her for trumpet lessons. Her reaction was "oh shiiiiiit"

So the car hit us, and I smashed my head (I remember this now because I remember the pain). It was a cold metal vibration sound in my head and everything was black. I remember waking up and thinking to myself:

"Hey, we just came from that direction..." and then "Wow...so that's how our airbags look."

I was promptly strapped to a backboard with a neck brace ill fitted around my head. For 2 hours I wore this poorly made and assembled neck brace. As they wheeled me into the ER, my left hand started to go numb. Then I though to myself:

"Self, thank God it's not my right hand or else I would never be able to play the trumpet again..."

After throwing my left hand against the rails of the gurney and no success my mouth and lips started to go numb. My heart quicken and I thought to myself:

"Self...I spoke too soon. I'm dying and I will never be able to play trumpet again since I can't feel my lips."

I was coming from a bad place in my musical life. I rebelled against my love for the subject and rejected my musical friends. I denied that I ever knew how to play. I was so depressed and scared to perform. I switch environments and I started to learn to love my subject thanks to that very professor I mention a few lines up. Now I must rebuild my jaw and its muscles.

So my professor in the end told me to rest fully and to not return to playing until it completely healed.

Flugelhorns

I like this blogger and I decided to keep it.

Onto a topic that I think a minority of musicians really know about-the Flugelhorn.

What is exactly a flugelhorn?


That is my flugelhorn, Frankie. The flugelhorn was created in Austria and it a member of the brass family. It has three valves and is usually in the key of B flat. It very similar to the trumpet by the way it is played, which made it a lot easier to switch to on my part. There are different versions of the flugelhorn...I prefer the "flugelhorn" look with the vertical slides. Getzen makes a flugelhorn that looks like a trumpet with a long loop. If i want to play a flugelhorn I would prefer to play one that looks different than a trumpet..since it is different.

The flugelhorn has a very rich and mellow sound. It's darker than the bright trumpet sound and is similar to a french horn. The tubing is wider and the bell is bigger. The tuning slide is where the mouthpiece connects and some flugels have a third valve trigger. The trigger allows the 3rd valve to be played in tune. Unfortunately my Frankie does not have a third valve trigger. My flugel is an Amati student flugelhorn. Why do I have one? Funny story. I was supposed to play in the pit for Into the Woods at my old grammar school but they had enough trumpets. I was told to get a flugelhorn and the director would transpose the french horn music into the key of b flat...so you can have me play and still have the french horn sound.

That didn't happen. But I did get the flugelhorn. My mom searched all over the island for one and she found a store that rented it for 90 dollars...FOR 12 MONTHS! Amazing. When it was time to renew my rental they sold it my mom for 500. It's pricetag was about 1000 dollars, but it was used (by me) and now it is my baby.

I don't even know what the mouthpiece size is but I'm going to go with the equiv. of a 7C or 5C trumpet piece. She sits on a flugelhorn stand (for a while she was sitting on my studio trumpet stand...because it was studier then my portable trumpet stand...the bell is bigger...duh.) I use Zaja French Vanilla valve oil on it. I think my next blog will be about that very product. It smells like French vanilla and I got turned onto it by a trumpet mate at my previous college. She doesn't know that she influenced me to get it but I saw how much fun she was having with it.

That's about it for now...

PoJ

Ok...now what does a musician doe when her jaw is swollen?

People drive like idiots these days. I was going to work and my dad drove me. I have no car but I do have my license but my mom and dad need their cars so off i go to work with dad. We had a green light and the next thing I knew as we were crossing...this 20 year old something guy slammed in us.

I went into my door, and passed out. I woke up to find me staring at the direction we just CAME from. Well, a few hours later the hospital released me with a closed head injury. Yeah. Even better.

The next morning my girlfriend came over and we found more bumps and bruising, especially around my jaw. Well here's my question, how does a musician practice for a gig in the next three weeks when she has a swollen jaw!

What does a musician do when she fears playing music?

I love music and I say it often. When I’m work, I sit and watch some amazing musicians walk onto the stage and play. I get envious and decide that when I get home I’ll attach my silent mute to my trumpet and play for a few before bed. I get home and that doesn’t happen because I’m completely wiped out. I come home my music classes, again completely wiped out and I miss out on playing.

My girlfriend got me back into jamming. She plays the guitar and bass, and invited me over to jam. The next thing that happened was even more amazing. I got a small gig of playing at her graduation party. In light of all this, I enrolled myself into private lessons on campus next year with my Western Music professor. I’m really excited. Then they asked me to audition for the orchestra. SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEECH!

I think that’s where I noticed my fear of going back to playing on stage. I performed so much during my Senior year of high school. I was playing 6 hours a day and I was practicing my ass off to get a scholarship into CW Post’s music department. The week of my audition, I was at work and I passed out. I was taken to the hospital and I found out I suffer from vesa vego, an everyday phenomenon that everyone experiences. It’s when the blood doesn’t get to your head quick enough, causing dizziness and sometimes blacking out. Such things involve standing up to quickly. This explained why I would stumble out of Jazz Band practice and lay down on the floor or fall into one of my friends in the hallway. When I play, the air stream and blood movement gets screwed up. I push to force air out and that slows the blood movement to my head…causing redness and yes…dots to appear before my eyes.

Also musicians suffer from extreme mood changes. While playing, it’s a natural high and it makes you feel good inside. The following day I would sink into an extreme swing of depression to the point that I was physically sick. With the vesa vego and this change in moods, I suffered throughout my playing in Senior year…but it didn’t stop me from getting into CW Post. At Post though, I traveled 4 hours and had 13 hour days. All of a sudden the depression sunk lower and I got sick. So sick that I couldn’t pick up my trumpet without getting sick.

During this period of time, I developed this fear of performing and playing. I miss playing so much, but a part of me is scared of passing out or getting sick again. I’m also afraid of the severe mood changes. But thankfully this summer I vowed to get myself back on the horse. I can’t stay scared forever, especially from something that gives me so much joy. Kate’s graduation party is my stepping stone, and from there who knows what I’ll get myself into but I’m willing and ready to see where my music takes me again.